Ted Streuli, The Daily Record Newswire
We struggle and struggle and then something comes along and causes the forehead slap of the week.Today’s was provided by the good folks of Ohio State University.
The bane of our existence, and that of most parents, is sleep. More correctly, lack of sleep. Sleep deprivation for parents comes in many forms for many years. There are the newborn months, when the baby is hungry every 17 minutes and forces you awake with a cry. The bleary-eyed parents of newborns shift from enjoying the novelty of the whole thing to risking traumatic brain injury as their foreheads fall with a thump upon their desks by midafternoon. Endure, ye new parents; there is a shift a couple of months when four hours suddenly looks like a good night of sleep and you’ll awake in a falsely energized state that may have long-term health effects but will allow you to remain employed.
The phenomenon of uninterrupted sleep hasn’t been bestowed upon Casa Streuli in seven years. Just as the firstborn settled into a reasonable nighttime routine, baby brother showed up to ensure those bags under our eyes would be traveling with us a while longer. Seven years, friends. Do the math. That’s 2,555 consecutive nights of waking at least once between 10 p.m. and 6 a.m., often coupled with a climb up the stairs, a bare foot on a Lego, and a mattress that’s both over-hard and overcrowded with a little blond wiggler.
Sure, the newborn gets off the frequent feeding schedule, but then it’s on to losing the binky, monsters in the closet, sounds outside, and what if somebody breaks in?
“Can’t I just sleep with you?”
Oh, alright. Get in. Go back to sleep.
Lately it’s been fashionable for each to wake up and claim to be scared. Not of anything in particular, mind you, nothing the old can of Monster Spray can fix. Just scared.
“Can’t I just sleep with you?”
And then, WHAP! I’m eating my Cheerios, browsing the Aug. 7 issue of The Journal of Neuroscience, and there it is – a study conducted by researchers at Ohio State University (you knew I’d get back to them eventually). The scientists there found out that the color of one’s night light makes all the difference. Here is the pertinent paragraph:
The research examined the role of specialized photosensitive cells in the retina — called ipRGCs — that don’t have a major role in vision, but detect light and send messages to a part of the brain that helps regulate the body’s circadian clock. This is the body’s master clock that helps determine when people feel sleepy and awake.
Aha! It’s their little ipRGCs! I am rubbing my hands together like a mad scientist with wild hair and a lab coat. My eyes feel as though they might belong to Marty Feldman.
Here’s what happened: The scientists put blue, red and white lights on where some poor, unsuspecting female Siberian hamsters were expecting a little shut-eye. It turned out that blue light made them sad and depressed, ready for a little rodent Prozac, but the red light made them relaxed and happy. The critical information was that white light made them almost as miserable as blue light.
And that’s it! Every light in our house is white, including the night lights, which glow gallantly on in each boy’s bedroom. The researchers seem to think the value of their findings is that employers may find that installing red lights for night-shift workers will improve morale and productivity, but I know better.
The real value of that study is in the sleep we parents are sure to get just as soon as we switch out those night lights.
