Counselor's Corner: A gathering of love


When people gather in a loving manner something profound happens. This past Saturday we attended a quinceanera party in honor of our granddaughter, Miabella who turned fifteen. It is a Mexican tradition that when a young girl turns fifteen, those who are important in her life gather together and celebrate her. What a celebration of love. Friends we have known for over 50 years were present. Loving and wonderful teachers of Miabella and her three sisters were there. It was a celebration for the old and the young. A mariachi band inspired us with song and great music. We shared memories with friends of 50 years as well as new friends in a caring and loving manner. The presence of love was all around us. More than 80 people relaxed under the blue sky and the colored festive lights in the beautiful courtyard of our daughter and her loving husband’s home. It was a joyful and loving afternoon. There was a huge inflatable slide for the many children that were also there who simply rejoiced with each other.

The beauty of this afternoon was the love that was all around. Watching our adult children and grandchildren sharing love with others was an inspiration. Experiencing the joy of our daughter and son-in law on this amazing day radiated much love and kindness. Our granddaughter, Miabella, had a loving smile for everyone. It was good to be with all these wonderful people after this year and a half of isolation. What a great celebration of love. Sharing with long term friends, sharing with Miabella’s teachers and their spouses, sharing with many soccer friends, and of course with Miabella’s grandmother and aunt from Mexico. So much love!

This day reminded me of the importance of always be loving toward everyone. I left this celebration feeling more connected to people. I realized that people were simply reaching out to one another in a loving and compassionate manner. I took many pictures of this day and they all seem to indicate that love was in the air surrounding all of us. This celebration reminded me of a basic principle of a happy life: Be loving and caring toward everyone. It is not so important how people might treat us but it is important how we treat other people. This day reminded me of the power of love to change the world.

We can change the world by a decision to be loving. Well, at least we can change our corner of the world by loving words and actions towards others and choosing not to take part in negative thinking. This day was a profound reminder of the power of love.

Gatherings like this bring out the best in people. I think it is because the decision to attend a celebration becomes a decision to be loving. When a group of people gather together to celebrate an occasion, love begins to reign supreme. I think that when one person makes a decision to be loving, it positively affects the people around them.

On this day, September 11, we had a gathering of love. It reminded me of how much love was expressed on this same day, 20 years ago when so many people died helping other people after our country was attacked. Love will always overcome hatred and tragedy. This gathering of love this past Saturday of family and friends brought me into a deeper realization of the power of loving one another.

I was inspired, mesmerized and motivated to understand the simple principle of a happy life. Be loving and kind to everyone and continue to realize that God is always loving. This is what I experienced at this joy filled and amazing quinceaniera celebration.


Fred Cavaiani is a licensed marriage counselor and psychologist with a private practice in Troy. He is the founder of Marriage Growth Center and is a consultant for the Detroit Medical Center. He can be reached at 248-362-3340. His e-mail address is: and his website is

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