COUNSELOR'S CORNER: The power of holy people

By Fred Cavaiani

Each day I read about “holy” people of the past. They all had three clear qualities. 1) they spent much time in prayer and meditation 2) they were always loving and caring. 3) they did not consider themselves holy or better than others. The power of these holy people emanated an energy that inspired others. These “holy people “ did not seek popularity.

They did not seek to criticize the world for its faults and failures. They simply wanted to become immersed in God and be kind to others.

Such a simple way of life. Such an internal freedom. Imagine going through life without becoming critical of other people. Imagine experiencing SOMEONE or SOMETHING so vast, loving and big that it fulfilled your deepest desires in each moment of life. These “holy” people experienced what everyone is searching for: a love and peace and profound connection of joy beauty and wisdom in each moment of life.

This is why “holy” people seek much quiet time. And when they do interact with other people who seek them out, it is a profound loving connection.

Imagine yourself going through life loving everyone and never embracing negative thoughts, actions or feelings toward people. Have you ever been with someone who thinks this way and acts this way? When you are with someone like this, you feel a sense of connection, a sense of love and a sense of peace.

As the years roll by, I am realizing the importance of spending much time in prayerful silence and meditation. It creates an awareness in me of what blocks me from being kinder and more loving. It helps me to have a deeper experience of God. And it helps me to realize that I am no better than anyone else but if I simply turn toward God consistently, amazing internal, peaceful experiences will keep happening inside of me. No one has to change for me to be happy. Nothing in the world has to change except for me to be more reflective and more loving.

I am starting to understand why “holy” people spend so much time in prayer and meditation. It becomes a connection with a very big and loving God. I don’t have to save anyone or fix anyone. Peace comes from loving everyone. If I connect to everyone in a loving manner, I create a positive atmosphere for people to love themselves and understand their own personal self.

If I become busy and preoccupied with the next moment, I start rushing through life and reflective silence goes out the window. So does my peace and joy.

Now I get it. “Holy people” don’t rush through life. They experience the present moment and have an experience of God in the present moment.

Have you ever been with someone who tells you: “just be quiet and listen.” Have you ever told someone else, “Would you just be quiet and listen to me?” I think I am beginning to understand what that means. I need to just be quiet and quietly listen to God. This happens when I take a lot of time for prayerful, reflective silence. It also happens when I gently and quietly listen to others.

I have mentioned this before in a previous article but I need to mention this again. My Italian grandmother, would often say to me: “Slow down, Freddy. Don’t be in such a hurry.”

I now realize that “holy” people realized the profound meaning of those words of my grandmother. They understood the meaning of slowing down, being quiet, and experiencing God. I think getting older can teach everyone some valuable lessons. But learning to take a lot of quiet time with God can happen at any age and help each person young or old to embrace the profound experience of Love and God, and emanate a positive energy into the world. I hope to be a humble, holy person each day of my life. But “Freddy, slow down.!” “Yes, Grandma, I will.”
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Fred Cavaiani is a licensed marriage & family therapist and limited licensed psychologist with a private practice in Troy. He is the founder of Marriage Growth Center. He conducts numerous programs for groups throughout Michigan. Cavaiani is associate editor and contributing writer for Human Development Magazine. His column in the Legal News runs every other Tuesday. He can be reached at 248-362-3340. His e-mail address is: Fredcavi@yahoo.com and his website is FredsCounselorsCorner.com.