This past weekend my wife and I attended a high school graduation party for our oldest grandchild. We have eight grandchildren. He will be starting college this Fall. So many of our close friends of many years attended this joyful gathering given by our eldest daughter. One friend who is 98 years old even attended with his wonderful wife. As I sat and talked with our old friends and with all the members of our family, I had a profound sense of gratitude for our friends and family. There was a common theme throughout this joyful afternoon: It was genuine love and friendship for one another over many years. For over fifty years our friends have been with us at many gatherings. Such beautiful memories of love and friendship surfaced at this gathering.
Gatherings are important because they give us a sense of the best of friendships and the best of family. When I can remember the joys of friendship and the positive experiences of family, I become nudged into looking at the good experiences of my life. I also become more aware of the goodness in other people. It reinforces my awareness that everyone seeks love in life and that everyone wants to be loving. Gatherings of family and friends help us to realize the importance of love and kindness.
Love-Gatherings is a good term for describing birthdays, weddings, graduations, family reunions and friend parties. It becomes a time to reflect on the importance of Love and to appreciate our history with friends and family. A Love Gathering becomes a time to reflect more deeply on the purpose of life and the shortness of life on this earth. As I was conversing with all these long term friends at Jack's graduation party, I felt grateful and inspired. In the next few years, we will all be attending "good bye" gatherings because one or the other of us will be going on to the next life. In fact, today, June 25, as I am writing this article, I am remembering a dear close friend, who died just a year ago today.
Love Gatherings are absolutely needed by all of us. They are an amazing treasure that is transforming. Love Gatherings bring us into a gentle focus of love, friendship, God and the journey through life.
I was impressed to see so many of Jack's high school buddies come to pay him a visit. Jack's humble, gentle and quiet approach with people had inspired many of his high school friends. So here we are at this Love Gathering with the very old and the very young. But the common theme was simple love and kindness.
A happy life, no matter our age, is based on showing love and compassion to everyone. The older we get the more we realize this. The younger we might be, the more we get a glimpse of the importance of love and kindness because it becomes so evident at Love Gatherings.
When I saw Andy, 98 years old, walk through the door I felt like crying. Well, the truth is, that I felt like crying tears of joy when I saw everyone who came to this glorious Love Gathering.
I am realizing profoundly, in my senior years, the importance of Love Gatherings. Life is meant to be one consistent Love Gathering. Whomever I am with, family, friends, store clerks, strangers who pass by me: These are all opportunities for a Love Gathering by speaking lovingly, affirmatively and gently. When I do this, I make my little corner of the world a Love Gathering.
At this graduation party, the ages ranged from 18 months old to ninety eight years old. And each person was sending out positive examples of love. This party has renewed me and inspired me to be a positive vessel of love. Maybe the purpose of a transformed life needs to be an effort to have more Love Gatherings.
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Fred Cavaiani is a licensed marriage & family therapist and limited licensed psychologist with a private practice in Troy. He is the founder of Marriage Growth Center. He conducts numerous programs for groups throughout Michigan. Cavaiani is associate editor and contributing writer for Human Development Magazine. His column in the Legal News runs every other Tuesday. He can be reached at 248-362-3340. His e-mail address is: Fredcavi@yahoo.com and his website is FredsCounselorsCorner.com.
