Complaint department
By Nick Roumel
“May It Please the Palate” is not pleased. I cannot remember the last time I cooked a meal. Today will be another day of both lunch and dinner on the road, as I embark on a round trip to Tawas City for some delicious collective bargaining.
Tomorrow will be more of the same, as I focus on the most challenging work task of all: getting ready for a vacation. As stressful as it is to be a litigator, there is nothing more soul killing than preparing for time off. Every day I check a couple of things off my list, only to have twice as many replace them. I am reminded of a short art film I saw many years ago: it was nothing but a woman sweeping the sand off the beach, only to have the tide regularly return it.
Inevitably there will be things that won’t get checked off the list. Those will be punted until my vacation return, to be impatiently waiting for me along with piles of mail, pages of email notifications (often featuring that cutesy paper clip “attachment” icon), phone messages, and invariably, frustrated clients.
Is it any wonder that as I peruse recipe ideas for this column, my first reaction is “who has the time?” Food writer Mark Bittman recently took up this dilemma for Time magazine. He discussed the “fetishizing” of food, from TV cooking shows to endless blogs, and the amazing abundance of fresh ingredients in supermarkets. Bittman then posed the question - with all this, why don’t Americans make more of an effort to prepare even simple home-cooked meals?
I don’t have an answer. Maybe Bittman did, but without a subscription to Time, I didn’t get to read the rest of the article. But I have a hint: it’s in the name of that magazine.
But really, who wants to hear me complain? It’s like that Monty Python skit where the man goes to the complaint department, only to find that the clerk has more complaints than he does:
Man: I want to complain.
Clerk: You want to complain! Look at these shoes. I’ve only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through.
Man: No, I want to complain about...
Clerk: If you complain nothing happens, you might as well not bother.
So what’s a man to do? Well there is one thing I’m looking forward to on this vacation: I’m going to the land of Mai Tais. Sitting on the beach, soaking up the sun, and knocking back a fruity foo-foo drink. Like this one:
Classic Mai Tai Recipe
There are many versions of this tropical drink; this one comes from legendary restaurant Trader Vic’s. Orgeat syrup is an almond-sugar syrup that gives the drink a unique richness.
1 oz amber rum
1 oz dark rum
1 oz fresh lime juice
1/2 oz orgeat syrup
1/2 oz of Cointreau or orange curaçao
Add above ingredients to a cocktail shaker; shake and strain into a rocks glass over crushed ice. Garnish with mint and/or a lime wedge.
Drink and repeat until work is forgotten. Complain? Who has time for that?
Nick Roumel is a principal with Nacht, Roumel, Salvatore, Blanchard and Walker, P.C., a litigation firm in Ann Arbor specializing in employment litigation. He also has many years of varied restaurant and catering experience, has taught Greek cooking classes, and writes a food/restaurant column for “Current” magazine in Ann Arbor. He occasionally updates his blog at http://mayitpleasethepalate.blogspot.com/.
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