Is anyone curious what about what will be this year’s average pricetag for a typical Thanksgiving dinner? I would love to inform you, except I am writing this column before The Farm Bureau Federation (FBF) has the final volunteer price scout reports in from its members who each year supply the foundational numbers for this important bit of data. You will need to stay tuned, yourself.
What I can tell you is that in 2025, the FBF folks reported the typical cost of a Thanksgiving dinner for 10 people was $55.18, which breaks down to $5.52 per person. They pointed out this is far better than the record-high 2022 Thanksgiving meal cost, when the Turkey Day dinner for that same group of 10 was $64.05.
What all is included in the “classic” Thanksgiving dinner? It consists of turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, rolls, peas, cranberries, a veggie tray and pumpkin pie with whipped cream. Immediately, I can see a couple of obvious errors in what they regard as classic Thanksgiving foods. Peas?! PULEASE!
If it were up to me, I’d cut those stupid veggies directly out of the meal and price from the get-go and spare millions of American children the problem of trying to discreetly palm and secret into their napkins those wrinkly little green orbs. Besides, everyone knows it was NOT peas, but green bean casserole with French-fried onions on top that was served at the first Thanksgiving. Duh!
Additionally, we need green bean casserole as a relatively fool-proof item for assigning to new- and non-cooks as their contribution to Thanksgiving dinner (while the bringing of the olives remains reserved for the proven notoriously bad cooks). Most research shows holiday guests are less likely to be food-poisoned by green beans. Overall veggie-wise, the veggie tray needs to go. Nobody’s thankful for carrot and celery sticks!
Another item that was omitted from the FBF’s classic Thanksgiving meal was mashed potatoes, as in plain old white or Yukon gold spuds. And REAL tators at that! No boxed or pre-made store-bought crap. I can imagine the riot that would ensue at our huge, extended family Thanksgiving dinner table when someone asked someone to pass the mashed potatoes and I had to announce there weren’t any this year in keeping within the Farm Bureau Federation’s impaired imagination of what constitutes a Thanksgiving dinner.
Again, while the IQ of the average holiday glutton is not that high, most often they are sharp enough to recognized a Thanksgiving meal without mashed potatoes is a poor excuse for a Thanksgiving meal. I have this on good authority from a pillow on my couch that bears the famous Norman Rockwell painting “Freedom from Want,” showing an eager family gathering around a Thanksgiving table with grandparents presenting them with a platter bearing a huge turkey. The table features a large, covered silver serving bowl that I’m certain contained mashed potatoes.
The absence of mashed potatoes makes me seriously wonder what serious kinds of drugs the creators of what constitutes a classic Thanksgiving feast were doing! Certainly not the kind that gave them the munchies for an extra-large serving of mashed potatoes slathered in butter and/or gravy! Sweet potatoes are good, but as an add-on, not a substitution for the regular mashed variety.
My inquiring mind would also like to know who will be doing the rationing of the FBF’s classic Turkey Day meal. In good conscience, I could not implement portion control on Thanksgiving. Going all registered dietician on my relatives and insisting they take only a “playing card-sized” piece of turkey would result in strong backlash – to my body – and lifetime banishment to the kids’ table.
It’s tempting to instead purchase Costco’s Complete Gourmet Thanksgiving Turkey Dinner for eight for $199.99. What’s included that jacks the per-meal price up to restaurant level? Five pounds of turkey, three pounds each of mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, green bean casserole (no stinkin’ peas!) cornbread stuffing and sweetcorn; plus candied yams, gravy, cranberry relish/sauce, 12 dinner rolls, pumpkin pie and apple cobbler. Yum!
Normally, I go with homemade holiday food, but the store-bought stuff is suddenly sounding considerably safer for many reasons! Unfortunately, someone still needs to bring olives.
————————
Kristy Smith is a contributor to the Climax Crescent. Smith’s Different Drum humor columns are archived at her blog: diffdrum.wordpress.com.
What I can tell you is that in 2025, the FBF folks reported the typical cost of a Thanksgiving dinner for 10 people was $55.18, which breaks down to $5.52 per person. They pointed out this is far better than the record-high 2022 Thanksgiving meal cost, when the Turkey Day dinner for that same group of 10 was $64.05.
What all is included in the “classic” Thanksgiving dinner? It consists of turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, rolls, peas, cranberries, a veggie tray and pumpkin pie with whipped cream. Immediately, I can see a couple of obvious errors in what they regard as classic Thanksgiving foods. Peas?! PULEASE!
If it were up to me, I’d cut those stupid veggies directly out of the meal and price from the get-go and spare millions of American children the problem of trying to discreetly palm and secret into their napkins those wrinkly little green orbs. Besides, everyone knows it was NOT peas, but green bean casserole with French-fried onions on top that was served at the first Thanksgiving. Duh!
Additionally, we need green bean casserole as a relatively fool-proof item for assigning to new- and non-cooks as their contribution to Thanksgiving dinner (while the bringing of the olives remains reserved for the proven notoriously bad cooks). Most research shows holiday guests are less likely to be food-poisoned by green beans. Overall veggie-wise, the veggie tray needs to go. Nobody’s thankful for carrot and celery sticks!
Another item that was omitted from the FBF’s classic Thanksgiving meal was mashed potatoes, as in plain old white or Yukon gold spuds. And REAL tators at that! No boxed or pre-made store-bought crap. I can imagine the riot that would ensue at our huge, extended family Thanksgiving dinner table when someone asked someone to pass the mashed potatoes and I had to announce there weren’t any this year in keeping within the Farm Bureau Federation’s impaired imagination of what constitutes a Thanksgiving dinner.
Again, while the IQ of the average holiday glutton is not that high, most often they are sharp enough to recognized a Thanksgiving meal without mashed potatoes is a poor excuse for a Thanksgiving meal. I have this on good authority from a pillow on my couch that bears the famous Norman Rockwell painting “Freedom from Want,” showing an eager family gathering around a Thanksgiving table with grandparents presenting them with a platter bearing a huge turkey. The table features a large, covered silver serving bowl that I’m certain contained mashed potatoes.
The absence of mashed potatoes makes me seriously wonder what serious kinds of drugs the creators of what constitutes a classic Thanksgiving feast were doing! Certainly not the kind that gave them the munchies for an extra-large serving of mashed potatoes slathered in butter and/or gravy! Sweet potatoes are good, but as an add-on, not a substitution for the regular mashed variety.
My inquiring mind would also like to know who will be doing the rationing of the FBF’s classic Turkey Day meal. In good conscience, I could not implement portion control on Thanksgiving. Going all registered dietician on my relatives and insisting they take only a “playing card-sized” piece of turkey would result in strong backlash – to my body – and lifetime banishment to the kids’ table.
It’s tempting to instead purchase Costco’s Complete Gourmet Thanksgiving Turkey Dinner for eight for $199.99. What’s included that jacks the per-meal price up to restaurant level? Five pounds of turkey, three pounds each of mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, green bean casserole (no stinkin’ peas!) cornbread stuffing and sweetcorn; plus candied yams, gravy, cranberry relish/sauce, 12 dinner rolls, pumpkin pie and apple cobbler. Yum!
Normally, I go with homemade holiday food, but the store-bought stuff is suddenly sounding considerably safer for many reasons! Unfortunately, someone still needs to bring olives.
————————
Kristy Smith is a contributor to the Climax Crescent. Smith’s Different Drum humor columns are archived at her blog: diffdrum.wordpress.com.
