COUNSELOR'S CORNER: Compassion and goodness in the midst of crisis


I have been inspired by the goodness inside of so many people in the midst of this coronavirus pandemic.There is such goodness in all of us.

When a worldwide struggle happens, everyone becomes more connected. For many people, goodness and compassion surfaces with the realization that we need one another. I have witnessed care and compassion from many people.

Those in the medical field are very brave. We begin to appreciate how many people risk their lives to keep all of us safe. It can be a grocery worker who delivers groceries. It can be a doctor or medical person.

Living in Michigan for most of my life has given me a great appreciation for this state. If I go for a run or a walk, most people will wave and smile. There is a kindness in Michigan that is marvelous to behold.

I think crisis often brings out the best in people. We are all suffering from a sense of powerlessness right now.

This global sense of powerlessness nudges all of us to realize how much we need one another. Though we may have to keep social distancing, our emotional need for each other is stronger than ever.

We show love and respect for one another by wearing masks and remaining six feet from one another.

Compassion and goodness will remain. It will be the antidote for our society. In fact, it is the prime antidote for living a healthy emotional and spiritual life.

When someone is not compassionate and kind to others, this now stands out vividly and unattractively. In the midst of crisis goodness shines even brighter. Selfishness and criticism seem cruel and out of place.

Love conquers all because the goodness inside all of us is being challenged to surface.

I was a young boy during World War II. I remember vividly though how kind and connected people were to one another. My father and uncle served in the Navy and Army. They risked their lives willingly and without any complaints. I am seeing this again in many people.

A national crisis becomes an opportunity for people to become more loving and compassionate. It also nudges everyone to look at life in a deeper manner. It challenges us all to look at what is most important in life.

The most important principle for everyone right now is to bring more love into the present moment. Life is not how other people treat us. It is how we treat other people.

The more love we bring into the present moment the quicker we will overcome this worldwide pandemic. The more I slow down and embrace this present moment, the calmer I will be and the more compassionate I will become.

I was on a Zoom gathering of friends this morning who gathered to simply and lovingly share their journey with one another right now. There was such an emotional connection with each other even though we couldn’t be physically present to another.

Thank God for advanced technology which allows us to see one another on our phone, computer, iPad or Kindle.

I think we need a television channel that only looks at the goodness of life and the kindness and compassion in people.

Look for the goodness in people.

When I do this my mind and emotions stay positive.

I do not have to invest in negativity. In fact, when I invest in negativity and criticism of others, I block my own compassion and kindness from surfacing.

I must not let negativity block me from bringing more love and kindness into the world.

The people who make the world kinder and gentler are the people who radiate love and compassion.

A crisis can help all of us make the world a kinder planet. Listen to the goodness, kindness and compassion inside of you right now. It is trying to surface. Let it come out.
Fred Cavaiani is a licensed marriage & family therapist and limited licensed psychologist with a private practice in Troy. He is the founder of Marriage Growth Center. He conducts numerous programs for groups throughout Michigan. Cavaiani is associate editor and contributing writer for Human Development Magazine.
He can be reached at 248-362-3340. His e-mail address is: and his website is