COUNSELOR'S CORNER: Medicine, love, prayer and courage

By Fred Cavaiani This past week my wife had major surgery. Cancer had returned. The surgery was serious. The surgeon said she would be in the hospital for four days to two weeks and be in the ICU unit the whole time. I was very worried. It is the second journey with cancer for my wife. So we sent out requests for prayer from our many friends and acquaintances. Wow. People really responded. Alice was operated on this past Thursday and came home on Sunday. Only three days in the hospital including the day of surgery. I finally was allowed to enter her room after she came from the recovery room. She looked radiant and beaming with wonderful color in her face. I was amazed. When people have serious surgery they usually look drained, tired, and with no color in their face. I couldn't believe it. Here was my wonderful wife who had just been operated on and had tubes coming out of her from so many places, sitting up in her bed with a smile on her face and a ruddy, healthy complexion. I was mesmerized for a moment. Then I began to ponder things. She had a great, compassionate surgeon. The unit she was on was staffed with caring and compassionate nurses. Everyone was sensitive and very loving. There was such an atmosphere of care and compassion on this special floor. Love was in the air from the surgeon and other doctors who came to see her, to the nurses, to the entire staff of the unit who entered her room. Each time I visited her I was warmly welcomed onto the floor. Alice was surrounded by compassion and she brought such kindness to other people while she was there. It was a dance of loving connections with everyone. I am convinced that the prayers that people said from all over the country were positive energies that were sent to her. I think that God has given all of us the ability to direct energy and grace to other people. When we pray for someone else we send them a unit of loving and healing energy much in the same way we experience someone in a positive, loving manner. Every person has the ability to do this. God is not arbitrary helping only those who get prayed for. He is there for everyone. Yet when we pray for someone we send something to that person - energy, grace and love which can be very healing. Imagine being wrapped in loving concern by other people. We can either accept this or run from it. When we accept loving energy we feel better, physically, emotionally and spiritually. We are all given the power to make the world a better place. We can use this power or discard it. This power was wonderfully activated this past week. I witnessed people using the power of Love and Grace make the world a better place these last four days. So many people sent warm, loving and prayerful wishes. (Facebook and email keeps us all connected. What a blessing.) Then there is the power of a strong woman. My wife is that type of person. She faces whatever comes her way with courage, unbelievable strength, love and an amazing sense of humor. Everyone who entered her room left feeling lighter and appreciated. They probably also had a smile on their face from one of Alice's humorous remarks. This is a woman who faces life without complaint. Because she embraces what is before her she meets everyone with warmth and strength. This warmth and strength is experienced by all who are in her presence. Combine prayer, love, courage and medicine and amazing events can happen. I personally experienced this combination during the last four days. What a wonderful combination. We can make things better. ---------- Fred Cavaiani is a licensed marriage counselor and psychologist with a private practice in Troy. He is the founder of Marriage Growth Center, a consultant for the Detroit Medical Center, and conducts numerous programs for groups throughout Southeast Michigan. His column in the Legal News runs every other Tuesday. He can be reached at (248)362-3340. His e-mail address is: Fredcavi@yahoo.com and his website is fredthecounselor.com. Published: Tue, Jan 31, 2012